RANTING BECUASE I AM FED UP
2005-12-06
I am beginning to get really fed up with people. Im gettinh a short fuse, i have no tolarance anymore. Yesterday i was almost screaming at someone becasuse they blamed me of something dumb like usual.
It's nothing to do with anyone else but me. I think christmas makes me behave in an anti-jess-like way which is stupid because i am jess.
I have a knack at knowing what people think of me by looking at them. Thats partly why i break up with so many people because my knack is always accuate.
So if i ask you what's up all the time. It means that knack is working overdrive.
People really dont understand me at school, even my closest friends. They dont undersatdn that i care for each and every one of them and its not in a sexual way.
If you didn't know, in my middle school..i had noooo one..no fran, no loz, no ru...well i had none of you guys anyway.
So you can kinda see why i apperciate every one of you being my friendsa because i hasd such a long toime hyaving friends that treated me like their pet.
And i thoguht thats what a friend was like because thats all i knew of one.
So my caringness is habiot and the nurture of my ways. So DONT judge me because of it.
Oh...i wish everyone would stop keeping me in the dark...gee...my whole life i have been given the cold shoulder and im sick to death with it!
Dont expect that i dont know what your thinking because i fooking do.
Anyway enough of that, but its good to get it off my chest.
I really need somewhere i can go and bve myself with out being that slight bit paranoid that someone will hate me for being me!
People do at my school...they dislike me..for well...being me.
In my group of old buds, you can never speak your mind because every blabs about it. I wish i could finally be able to do that.
I could for a while..but now people are being to think that i am a weak person because i relentlewsly talk about the way i feel...which m,akes me feel a bit like a self-centred bitch!
I do bottle myself up..i admit..this is why i'm doing this because the more i bottle up the worse i say.
It seems like forever ago that i saw Green Day...and it feels like it never haoppened. Green Day are my fav band and i cant share that with anyone now.
Im still obsessed but i cant talk about them with out getting ignorred and hated.
I AM SICK OF BEING IGNORED
i also have realised that when people talk to me they dont look me in the eye or face. If i have a nasty zit..at leats have the manners of telling me..or i'll think your just being incredibly rude.
thank you for listening..what to ask any questions...jusat sign my guestbook...ta